The Theory
by Cloudmaiden Nephele
Summary: “You know,” Ino proposed in a devious tone. “Since this is a theory, it should be tested.” Sakura looked scandalized...“Do you have a plan?”


**Disclaimer: I hold no claim to the characters or plot of Naruto**

_AN: Yet more evidence of my having too much time on my hands. This takes place chronologically after "The Catalyst". There will be something of a continuation to this called "The Plan"._

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**The Theory**

Two young women sat together in a small tea shop enjoying a brief respite amidst the daily bustle of the hidden village. A small tray of dango rested only partially touched on the table beside the pink-haired kunoichi who was slowly savoring her tea. A small curl of aromatic steam rose above the other untouched cup as the owner leaned on her hand and stared out at the street behind the navy curtains.

"It's so nice to finally get a chance to rest, isn't it Forehead?" the teal-eyed blonde remarked with a raised brow at her friend's semi-unresponsive state of mind.

"Yeah," Sakura agreed. "I just hope it stays that way."

"Should," Ino shrugged. "Things have been pretty peaceful around here recently. Nothing short of a disaster is going to drag me away from my well-deserved break and back to work. There are plenty of others who can do it, at least for a few hours."

"Yeah, I guess so."

"So, what's up with you recently?" the vivacious blonde demanded. "You've been a bit off ever since you went on that mission to find Sasuke a week ago."

"Oh, it's nothing really."

"Come on! Like I'm going to believe that! Did something happen while you were gone?"

"No, it was before we left," Sakura sighed with a resigned expression. "Naruto asked one of his ridiculous questions, and Sai just couldn't resist throwing out an unnerving and _completely_ unnecessary answer."

"Well, that's not so bad."

"This is Sai we're talking about."

"I don't see why you don't like him. He's really sweet," Ino gushed, ignoring her friend's twitching.

"You would think that, Ino-pig," Sakura ground out.

"Anyways," Ino sang dismissively. "Since I'm obviously out of the loop, how about you fill me in?"

"Naruto was wondering why Orochimaru's followers are all so young," Sakura explained with a dark glare. "Sai _volunteered_ the idea that it's because he's a pedophile."

"That's so _wrong_! Although, maybe if it was someone other than Orochimaru," Ino mused as she thoughtfully tapped her cheek. "Maybe Sai…"

"'Other than Orochimaru'? 'Maybe Sai'? What are you thinking Ino?" Sakura demanded suspiciously.

"Well, obviously the thought of Orochimaru with Sasuke in _that_ way is just…wrong," both women shuddered, "but maybe if it was someone really cute…"

"The idea has possibilities," Sakura agreed hesitantly before she realized what she was saying, "but it's still not right."

"Why not?" Ino smirked. "And you are in no position to say it's not right. I _did _hear about Konohamaru's jutsu."

"I'm never going to get any peace about that, am I?" Sakura moaned dejectedly with a pink tinge blooming across her face.

"Nope!" Ino giggled cheerfully. "I wish I had been there to see it."

"Huh? Why?"

"Two really hot guys making out?" Ino said lewdly as a lascivious smirk crossed her lips. "Who wouldn't want to see that? I will admit Forehead, you've got good taste."

"Are you telling me you like that kind of thing too?" Sakura blushed lightly as she covertly glanced around for any potential eavesdroppers.

"Of course!" Ino proclaimed shamelessly. "Most kunoichi do. It's just a matter of whether or not they'll own up to it. It's really quite a common thought. It almost has to be."

"What do you mean, Ino-pig?" Sakura asked, quite confused by the end of her friend's statement.

"Think about it Forehead," the mind-controlling woman lectured. "There are two male shinobi for every one kunoichi, and most shinobi don't involve themselves with civilians. Unless most of the men took a vow of celibacy, they simply have to be interested in other men along with women. Most kunoichi aren't promiscuous, and how often do you see ninja fighting over a woman. It's all perfectly logical."

"That does make sense," the pink-haired medic agreed with a nod. "It's almost scary."

"The theory?"

"No, that you're making so much sense about something that really shouldn't make so much sense."

"You're just jealous that I'm a genius," Ino preened with a triumphant air.

"Not likely," Sakura muttered playfully. "Anyways, your theory makes a lot of sense and it doesn't only apply to the hidden villages' shinobi."

"Hmm?"

"Take the Akatsuki for example," Sakura suggested. "They're missing-nin, so they can't exactly walk up to someone and proposition them because of their fugitive status, and I've never seen any women amongst them. Not that it would matter much with your theory."

"I agree, and it's almost guaranteed that they aren't celibate," Ino smirked. "It really makes you wonder what they do in their spare time."

"Ino!" Sakura shrieked as the two lapsed into uncontrollable giggles.

"You know," Ino proposed in a devious tone. "Since this _is_ a theory, it should be tested."

Sakura looked scandalized, her jade eyes widening considerably as she contemplated her fellow conspirator's words. "Do you have a plan?"

"Not yet, but I'll think of something."

"We're going to need reinforcements."

_Fin_


End file.
